Nurturing the Soul
The Transformative Power of
Self-Care on Mental Health

In our fast-paced, modern world, where the demands of daily life can feel overwhelming, taking the time for self-care is more crucial than ever. The concept of self-care extends beyond simple indulgences; it is a fundamental practice that contributes significantly to our mental health and overall well-being. In this blog post, we will explore the profound effects of self-care on mental health and why prioritizing oneself is not just a luxury but a necessity.

Self-care involves intentional actions and practices that promote physical, emotional, and mental well-being. It is a holistic approach to maintaining balance in our lives and nurturing a positive relationship with ourselves. This can encompass a wide range of activities, from basic hygiene and adequate sleep to engaging in activities that bring joy, relaxation, and fulfillment.

The Mental Health Connection

1. Stress Reduction: Engaging in self-care activities helps to alleviate stress, a common precursor to mental health challenges. Whether it’s taking a leisurely walk, practicing mindfulness through meditation, or enjoying a hobby, these activities trigger the relaxation response, reducing the impact of stress on our minds and bodies
2. Improved Emotional Regulation: Regular self-care fosters emotional resilience. When we take the time to understand and address our emotions, we can respond more effectively to life’s challenges. This emotional intelligence is a key factor in maintaining good mental health and building positive relationships with others.
3. Enhanced Self-Esteem: Investing in self-care sends a powerful message to ourselves — that we are worthy of love and attention. This positive affirmation contributes to improved self-esteem and a healthier self-image. When we prioritize our well-being, we are more likely to approach life with confidence and a sense of purpose.
4. Prevention of Burnout: Neglecting self-care can lead to burnout, a state of physical and emotional exhaustion. By incorporating regular self-care practices into our routines, we can prevent burnout and maintain a sustainable level of energy and motivation.

Practical Self-Care Tips

1. Establishing a Routine: Create a daily routine that includes dedicated time for self-care activities. This can be as simple as setting aside a few minutes each morning for deep breathing exercises or creating a bedtime ritual to unwind and relax.
2. Setting Boundaries: Learn to say no when necessary and establish boundaries to protect your time and energy. Recognize that it’s okay to prioritize your needs and well-being.
3. Mindful Practices: Incorporate mindfulness into your daily life. This could include meditation, yoga, or simply taking moments throughout the day to breathe deeply and be present in the current moment.
4. Physical Activity: Regular exercise is not only beneficial for physical health but also plays a significant role in mental well-being. Find an activity you enjoy, whether it’s walking, dancing, or practicing a sport, and make it a regular part of your routine.

In a world that often glorifies busyness, it’s essential to remember that self-care is not selfish; it’s a vital investment in our mental health. By prioritizing self-care, we can build resilience, cultivate a positive mindset, and navigate life’s challenges with grace. As we nurture our bodies and minds, we pave the way for a happier, healthier, and more fulfilling life. Remember, self-care is not a luxury; it’s a necessity on the journey to holistic well-being.

A great article on self-care from Very Well Mind

By Betsey Raya

 

 

What is Cognitive behavioral therapy?

Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) is a directive therapy, which means the therapist leads the process, teaching patients how to develop effective ways of coping with a range of problems, including depression, anxiety, and panic disorders. “Cognitive behavioral therapy is based on the idea that the person is having difficulties because of faulty thinking and behaviors,” says Burton Hutto, a psychiatrist and director of the Crisis Stabilization Inpatient Unit at the University of North Carolina, Chapel Hill, School of Medicine.

These “cognitive errors” or distorted thinking often manifest in self-criticism or guilt. “You may catastrophize situations, tending to imagine the worst or overestimate the likelihood of something bad happening,” says Lynn Bufka, associate executive director for practice research and policy at the American Psychological Association (APA). “For example, you might think, ‘It’s all my fault,’ or ‘I never do anything right.’”

How CBT works

CBT, Hutto says, helps you identify and change those negative thought patterns and behaviors that are wreaking havoc on your well-being. “You try to get a more realistic view of what’s going on,” Bufka says. “Someone who is really anxious about the coronavirus might be convinced that they’re going to get it and are going to die. That’s a possibility, but it’s not necessarily true.” CBT also helps you recognize and accept events that are beyond your control.

The therapy is structured and focused: You set a plan with the therapist at the beginning of the session. “Because there’s an agenda on what you’re going to accomplish, it’s a shorter-term therapy that typically doesn’t last much more than six months,” Hutto says. Patients learn coping techniques during sessions, such as learning practical, more productive ways to respond to distressing or anxiety-provoking situations or feelings (deep breathing exercises, for example). “There’s also homework,” Hutto says. “For example, keeping track of thoughts, feelings, and situations, then discussing them in the following therapy session.”

By 

Barbara Stepko, AARP

Published May 02, 2022

Read the whole article here
A Guide to Finding the Right Mental Health Therapist (aarp.org)

What Living Authentically Means

• Identifying and expressing genuine feelings.
• Facing our fear and having the courage to move through the fear to a deeper truth and power.
• Risking having real conversations.
• Welcoming every opportunity to increase the awareness of self and one’s effect on others.
• Trusting the world is abundant with gifts and then expressing gratitude for these gifts regularly.
• Acting from a deep sense of purpose and meaning that generates impeccable integrity.
• Evolving and being willing to intimately express who we are and what we believe. This is our essence in action.

 

Credit: Authentic Leadership Center, 2013

How to Live An Authentic Life: 6 Tips | Psych Central

Emotional Freedom Technique

”Tapping”, an alternative approach to managing anxiety,
stress, mood & more.
Jason Markel
Associate Marriage & Family Therapist
Authentic Counseling Associates

What is the Emotional Freedom Technique (Tapping)?

EFT or Tapping is an alternative treatment for emotional
and/or physical distress.

Tapping is a brief intervention combining elements of
exposure therapy, cognitive therapy, and somatic
stimulation of acupressure points on the head, face and
body.

Tapping purports to access Meridian lines (energy lines)
to soothe and regulate physical and emotional distress.

How does Tapping work?

Tapping is done in a circuit. It is generally repeated
at least three times and when guided, scaling of
symptoms are monitored.

The subject will “tap” on various points along the
head, face, and upper body while combining
acknowledgment of emotion and a positive
affirmation with deep breathing.

Brief History of EFT

1962 – Dr. George Goodheart, DC began studying Acupuncture
and developed a technique he called “Applied Kinesiology”.

1970’s – Dr. John Diamond, an Australian Psychiatrist built upon this by developing “Behavioral Kinesiology” adding affirmations to treat emotional problems.

1980’s – Dr. Roger Callahan, an American Psychologist studied the
The meridian system of Acupuncture furthered this approach
calling it Thought Field Therapy.

1990’s – Gary Craig, an enthusiastic student of Dr. Callahan began
marketing his own version, calling it EFT, to the general public

EFT Uses & Controversy

EFT is used by medical, psychological, and alternative health
practitioners to treat a variety of issues such as Anxiety, Phobias,
Depression and PTSD.

Proponents of EFT claim that EFT is widely studied and evidence-based.

Opponents of EFT claim it is pseudoscience and essentially
“quackery”.

During the course of preparing this presentation, it appeared that
some of the research that is often presented as evidence in favor of
EFT had repeating authors’ names and potential conflicts of interest.

My (Limited) Clinical Experience

I have seen EFT used with clients who have severe PTSD from the
2018 Camp Fire in Paradise, CA with successful outcomes.

Every time I have used EFT with a client it has produced results with
at least mild improvement.

As someone who practices “energy work”, I can’t claim to be
completely impartial, but whatever the reasoning for positive
outcomes – I find EFT to be a beneficial tool.

A Chaplain Speaks

Tapping to release emotional & physical stress

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vsnr2t7_-Bg

References:

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6381429/

What is EFT Tapping, and Can It Calm the ADHD Brain?

https://www.army.mil/article/45727/tapping_method_eases_stress_in_many

https://grainnemoneill.com/emotional-freedom-technique-history/

https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/pdf/10.1177/2515690X18823691

https://www.researchgate.net/profile/WendyComeau/publication/264552493_Assessment_of_the_Emotional_Freedom_T

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

My Father At My Table
By Dr. Christopher Mathe

(8-10-98 to my father)

I’ve fought so long

            So hard to deny

With angry, righteous cries

            Your place at my table.

Your pain walled away

            But alive and leaking

Through so many cracks

            To form the dark parts of me.

All you were, I cannot be.

            I’m so much more aware, alive

I do so much more than survive

            I long to turn toward the light and reject all you are.

I could not imagine you

            Hurting and alone

A child holding off the terror.

            Carrying your father’s wound.

            As I carry yours

When I look closely

            At the parts unseen

You child peeks back.

While your wound is not mine

            I can accept your humanness

And your presence that helped

            Shape the man I’ve become.

Come, break your fast

            At my table.

I have more to learn

            More tears to cry.

You are welcome,

My father.

I pray I will be welcome

            At my son’s table some day.

Thoughts on Change

Quotes and reflections by Chris Mathe, PhD

There came a time when the risk to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.
~ Anais Nin

To exist is to change, to change is to mature, to mature is to go on creating oneself endlessly.
~ Henri Bergson

Not everything that is faced can be changed, but nothing can be changed until it is faced.
~ James A. Baldwin

All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter another.
~ Anatole France

A person needs at intervals to separate from family and companions and go to new places. One must go without familiars in order to be open to influences, to change.
~ Katharine Butler Hathaway

You cannot step twice into the same river, for other waters are continually flowing in.
~ Heraclitus

The important thing is this: To be able at any moment to sacrifice what we are for what we could become.
~ Charles DuBois

We do not grow absolutely, chronologically. We grow sometimes in one dimension, and not in another; unevenly. We grow partially. We are relative. We are mature in one realm, childish in another. The past, present, and future mingle and pull us backward, forward, or fix us in the present. We are made up of layers, cells, constellations.
~ Anais Nin

You must be the change you wish to see in the world.
~ Mohandas Gandhi
brainyquote.com

Change is a continuous process of widening our perspectives and allowing more possibilities into our lives. Yes, it’s inevitable and everything is constantly changing, but we can choose to ride this wave with wonder and abundance or with fear and grasping. The choices we make determine how much joy and pain we feel in the process.

Why embracing change is the key to a good life – BBC Culture
What Makes Change Difficult? | Psychology Today

 

Diet is so important in the all-around functioning and health of our bodies. They are linking diet with more and more ailments and find that changing our eating habits to eat cleaner and eating the recommended portion sizes can change our health around and aid in combating various diseases and problems.

by Dr. Chris Mathe

Making small changes in what we eat can make a big difference in our physical, mental, and emotional health.

Diet

• Food basics
• Where to start?
• Tracking and goals
• Staying motivated

Diet – Food Basics

• We truly are what we eat. Health is what we are after.
• What we know:
  • The more plant-based food, the healthier (some examples.. Healthy Plant-Based Recipes That Use Spring Seasonal Produce (thehealthfeed.com)
  • The less processed food, the healthier
  • The fresher fruits, vegetables, and nuts, the healthier
  • For most of us, fewer carbohydrates is healthier
  • For most of us, fewer calories per day is healthier.
• The benefits of changes accrue immediately.

Diet – Where to Start?

• Our goal is to change our relationship with food – Not find the next fad diet.
• Making small, incremental changes leads to a habit that will last the rest of our lives.
• Talk with a doctor or nutritionist. Identify areas in your diet that have the most room for increased health.
• Any sustained movement along the lines of “what we know” will make a difference in our health.
• Start small and incrementally. Use the tools in the next two sections.

Diet – Tracking and Goals

• Consider using a tracking app. If you don’t measure it, it is very difficult to change it. (Best Calorie Counter Apps of 2023 (verywellfit.com)
• By tracking, you quickly will get more mindful about what and how much you eat.
• Plan for those situations that are the most challenging.
• Give yourself reasonable daily goals and break down longer term goals into small ones. (20 Achievable Goals To Set for Your Personal Development | Indeed.com)

Diet – Staying Motivated

• Make it routine; Think in terms of “The Zone.”
• Get a buddy or buddies.
• Join a support group.
• Track it! Plan it!
• Establish goals.
• Know your “why.”

Summary

• The effects start today
• Start small
• Make it a practice
• Work on self-compassion

 

Connection
by Dr. Chris Mathe

Connecting with safe others – friends, family, and support groups – is vital to our physical, mental, and emotional health.

Connection

• Huge benefits to social connection
• Where to start?
• Long term view
• Getting help

Connection – Huge benefits

• Improved quality of life: Social connection is a greater determinant of health than obesity, smoking, and high blood pressure.
• Boost mental health: Increases in social connection increase sense of belonging, purpose, happiness, self-worth, and confidence. insufficient social support increases mental health disorders like anxiety and depression.
• Longer Life: Individuals with stronger social relationships had a 50% increased likelihood of survival.
• Decrease risk of suicide: Relationships can play a crucial role in protecting a person against suicidal thoughts and behaviors.

Connection – Where to start?

• Start by looking inward: What interests, hobbies, and personalities do you like? Become active in your community; volunteer; join a club or social organization.
• If you meet a potential friend: Create opportunities to spend time together. Relationships require time and effort. Forming strong, healthy relationships with others means opening up, actively listening, and being open to sharing what you’re going through.

Connection – Long-term view

• Much as we may dislike it, relationships come and go
• Life circumstances and personality needs change
• An engaged life means constantly forming potential friendships
• Seeking ways to improve self and becoming a good listener could be helpful

Connection – Getting help

• Some people, for a variety of reasons, have trouble forming and keeping relationships
• Often experiences in our pasts make us afraid of connection – potential loss, hurt, or betrayal
• Being an introvert does not mean disliking connection
• Often a therapist, men’s or women’s group, or a spiritual group can be helpful

Connection – Summary

• Social connections are as important as any of the Big 5 for our physical, mental, and emotional health
• Start with the types of people and the activities that draw you and keep at it
• If you are having trouble, seek help

Resources:

Social Connection Definition | What Is Social Connection (berkeley.edu)

Social Connection Boosts Health, Even When You’re Isolated | Psychology Today

Lifeline (988lifeline.org)

Mindfulness
by Dr. Chris Mathe, PhD

Cultivating more acceptance and awareness of one’s feelings, thoughts, body sensations, and surroundings can substantially decrease anxiety and increase peace.

Mindfulness…

• What is it?
• Why “cultivate” it?
• Where do I start?

Mindfulness – what is it?

• Mindfulness means maintaining a moment-by-moment awareness of our thoughts, emotions, bodily sensations, and surrounding environment with openness and curiosity.
• Mindfulness helps us cultivate the “observer” in us where we can build the capacity to notice more of what is happening inside and outside of us.
• It is a practice of accepting – not pushing away or chasing – our thoughts and feelings.
• Exactly like maintaining physical health with regular practice that builds structure, mindfulness practice helps build emotional health by building structure.

Mindfulness – why cultivate it?

• Mindfulness can support and sustain you, by helping you manage the stress of today’s world.
• The American Psychological Association shares research on a range of benefits of mindfulness, including stress reduction, boosts to working memory, increased focus, less emotional reactivity, more cognitive flexibility, more relationship satisfaction
• More than the health benefits, mindfulness can help us develop our deeper human capacities for awareness, attention, empathy, kindness, and compassion.

Mindfulness – where do I start?

• The “Raisin” experiment. The Raisin Meditation For Mindful Eating (+ PDF) (mindfulnessbox.com)
• Using everyday activities. How to Practice “Everyday Mindfulness” – Mindfulness Muse
• Use an app. 13 Best Meditation and Mindfulness Apps for 2023 (developgoodhabits.com)
• Make it a practice.

In Summary…..

• The effects start today.
• Start small.
• Make it a practice.

 

THE CHRISTMAS TRAP

Jonathan Venn, Ph.D.

The novelist and short-story writer Mary Flannery O’Connor famously said of her home in the southeastern U.S., “I think it is safe to say that while the South is hardly Christ-centered, it is most certainly Christ-haunted.”

That describes how I feel about Christmas in the United States of America.

Americans take all their goodwill and good wishes and shove them into one brief holiday season.

People being who we are, creates inevitably a sort of mental trap.  It is an opportunity once a year to check and see how much our loved ones really care about us.  How many presents will they give us?  How much money will they spend on us?  Will they send a card?  Will they remember to call?  Will they tell us that they love us?

Accompanying these cultural expectations — which I have never found in the New Testament — comes the almost-inevitable converse:  the Christmas snub.  When loved ones do not give us the right present, or don’t spend enough money, or don’t send a card, etc., we get our feelings hurt.  Every year we get this one opportunity to check out our families and test their love for us.  I do not think this is what Christ intended.  How nice it would be if, instead, we would just love each other every day, all year long, in a Christ-filled way!  It might be better than getting a Christmas card.